Archive of the quotes featured on the Main Page.

July 13, 2011Edit

Jayne: I married me a powerful ugly creature.
Mal: [dressed as Jayne's wife to lure bandits] How can you say that? How can you shame me in front of new people?
Jayne Cobb and Malcolm Reynolds[src]


February 11, 2011Edit

Wash: Hey, I've been in a firefight before! Well, I was in a fire. Actually, I was fired from a fry-cook opportunity.
Hoban Washburne[src]

December 13, 2010Edit

Niska: Do you know the writings of Shan Yu?
Mal: We're starting a book club?
Adelai Niska and Malcolm Reynolds[src]

November 29, 2010Edit

Doralee: A place like this might be good for your sister. Quiet. Safe. A place where folks take care of each other.
Simon: Mmm, yes, seems like a lovely little community of kidnappers.
Doralee and Simon Tam[src]

November 18, 2010Edit

Jayne: Instead of us hanging around playing art critic till I get pinched by the Man, how's about we move away from this eerie-ass piece of work and get on with our increasingly eerie-ass day?
Jayne Cobb[src]

November 1, 2010Edit

Mal: Well, we may not have parted on the best of terms. I realize certain words were exchanged. Also, certain... bullets.
Malcolm Reynolds[src]

October 12, 2010Edit

Book: If you take sexual advantage of her, you're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater.
Derrial Book[src]

October 4, 2010Edit

Mal: He wears a red sash crossways.
Kaylee: Why does he do that?
Mal: Maybe he won the Miss Persephone Pageant. Just help me look.
Kaylee: Is that him?
Mal: That's the buffet table...
Kaylee: Well how can we be sure, unless we question it?
Malcolm Reynolds and Kaywinnit Lee Frye[src]

September 14, 2010Edit

Book: I've been out of the abbey two days, I've beaten a lawman senseless, I've fallen in with criminals. I watched the captain shoot the man I swore to protect. And I'm not even sure if I think he was wrong.
Derrial Book[src]

September 7, 2010Edit

Zoë: Is there any way I'm gonna get out of this with honor and dignity?
Wash: You're pretty much down to ritual suicide, lambie-toes.
Zoë Alleyne Washburne and Hoban Washburne[src]

August 31, 2010Edit

Zoë: We still gotta drop the goods.
Wash: And when we do, we fly off to Boros rich and prosperous. Well, less poor.
Zoë Alleyne Washburne and Hoban Washburne[src]

August 16, 2010Edit

Mal: We're not gonna die. We can't die, Bendis. You know why? Because we are so very pretty. We are just too pretty for God to let us die.
Malcolm Reynolds to Bendis[src]

August 6, 2010Edit

Mal: You are very much lacking in imagination.
Zoë: I imagine that's so, sir.
Malcolm Reynolds and Zoë Alleyne Washburne[src]

July 18, 2010Edit

Book: Yes, I'd forgotten you're moonlighting as a criminal mastermind now. Got your next heist planned?
Simon: No. But I'm thinking about growing a big black mustache. I'm a traditionalist.
Derrial Book and Simon Tam[src]

June 30, 2010Edit

Mal: I'm not leaving Serenity.
Inara: Mal — you don't have to die alone.
Mal: Everybody dies alone.
Malcolm Reynolds and Inara Serra[src]

June 21, 2010Edit

Mal: Fully loaded, safety off. This here is a recipe for unpleasantness, does she understand that?
River: She understands, she doesn't comprehend.
Mal: Well I'm glad we've made that distinction. No touching guns!
Malcolm Reynolds and River Tam[src]

June 9, 2010Edit

Book: I am a Shepherd. Folks like a man of God.
Mal: No, they don't. Men of God make everyone feel guilty and judged.
Derrial Book and Malcolm Reynolds[src]

May 21, 2010Edit

Mal: Persephone is not home. Too many people we need to avoid. Resupply, look for work, move along. We sniff the air, we don't kiss the dirt.
Zoë: Wasn't planning on the dirt-kissing, sir.
Wash: I wouldn't stand for it anyway, Captain, jealous man like me.
Malcolm Reynolds Zoë Alleyne Washburne and Hoban Washburne[src]

May 5, 2010Edit

Mal: It's nothin'.
Simon: I expect there's someone's face feels differently.
Mal: Well, they tell ya, never hit a man with a closed fist, but it is on occasion hilarious.
Malcolm Reynolds and Simon Tam[src]

April 27, 2010Edit

Zoë: Captain will come up with a plan.
Kaylee: That's good. Right?
Zoë: Possibly you're not recalling some of his previous plans.
Zoë Alleyne Washburne and Kaywinnet Lee Frye[src]

April 12, 2010Edit

Inara: What did I say to you about barging into my shuttle?
Mal: That it was manly and impulsive?
Inara: Yes, precisely. Only the exact phrase I used was "don't."
Inara Serra and Malcolm Reynolds[src]

March 31, 2010Edit

Zoë: Don't think it's a good spot, sir. She still has the advantage over us.
Mal: Everyone always does. That's what makes us special.
Zoë Alleyne Washburne and Malcolm Reynolds[src]

March 22, 2010Edit

Mal: Well. Looks can be deceiving.
Jayne: Not as deceiving as a low down dirty… deceiver.
Mal: Well said. Wasn't that well said, Zoë?
Zoë: Had a kind poetry to it, sir.
Malcolm Reynolds, Jayne Cobb and Zoë Alleyne Washburne[src]

March 10, 2010Edit

Simon: For this to work, River and I will have to be dead.
Jayne: Huh. I'm starting to like this plan.
Simon Tam and Jayne Cobb[src]

February 6, 2010Edit

Jayne: Testing. Testing, Captain, can you hear me?
Mal: I'm standing right here.
Jayne: You're coming through good and loud.
Mal: 'Cause I'm standing right here.
Jayne Cobb and Malcolm Reynolds[src]

January 23, 2010Edit

Mal: We've done the impossible, and that makes us mighty.
Malcolm Reynolds[src]

January 1, 2010Edit

Harken: Seems odd you'd name your ship after a battle you were on the wrong side of.
Mal: May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one.
Harken and Malcolm Reynolds[src]

November 21, 2009Edit

Jayne: Captain, can you stop her from bein' cheerful, please?
Mal: I don't believe there is a power in the 'verse that can stop Kaylee from being cheerful.
Jayne Cobb and Malcolm Reynolds talking about Kaylee[src]

October 28, 2009Edit

Zoë: Now we have a boatful of citizens right on top of our... stolen cargo. That's a fun mix.
Mal: Ain't no way in the 'verse they could find that compartment, even [stops talking as a passenger walks past] Even if they were lookin' for it.
Zoë: Why not?
Mal: 'Cause... ?
Zoë: Oh yeah, this is gonna go great.
Mal: If anyone gets nosy, just, you know... shoot 'em.
Zoë: Shoot 'em?
Mal: Politely.
Malcolm Reynolds and Zoë Alleyne Washburne[src]

October 13, 2009Edit

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.
Malcolm Reynolds and Zoë Alleyne Washburne[src]

September 27, 2009Edit

Mal: Inara, think you could stoop to being on my arm?
Inara: Will you wash it first?
Malcolm Reynolds and Inara Serra[src]

September 20, 2009Edit

Mal: Fully loaded, safety off. This here is a recipe for unpleasantness, does she understand that?
River: She understands, she doesn't comprehend.
Mal: Well I'm glad we've made that distinction. No touching guns!
Malcolm Reynolds and River Tam[src]

September 8, 2009Edit

Mal: "We've done the impossible, and that makes us mighty."
Malcolm Reynolds[src]

August 6, 2009Edit

Mal: "How come you didn't turn on me, Jayne?"
Jayne: "Money wasn't good enough."
Mal: "What happens when it is?"
Jayne: [smiling] "Well... that'll be an interesting day."
Malcolm Reynolds and Jayne Cobb[src]

April 17, 2006Edit

"After the Earth was used up, we found a new solar system and hundreds of new Earths were terra formed and colonized. The central planets formed the Alliance and decided all the planets had to join under their rule. There was some disagreement on that point. After the War, many of the Independents who had fought and lost drifted to the edges of the system, far from Alliance control. Out here, people struggled to get by with the most basic technologies; a ship would bring you work, a gun would help you keep it. A captain's goal was simple: find a crew, find a job, keep flying."

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